To be transparent, there is also disagreement within the world of psychology about anger and it’s role as an emotion. Some consider anger to be a “secondary” emotion – meaning the thing that triggered your angry emotions is not real culprit, but something else entirely. In this sense, anger is indicative of some other unmet emotional need you have buried deeper within. And some argue it’s not quite accurate to say its ‘secondary’, because anger has a healthy purpose and is part of our human evolutionary design. It’s there to alert us to something going wrong in our world.
Anger itself is a normal emotion. How you show your anger, and how long it takes to recover from a trigger are really where the heart of the conversation lies. In women, anger can be triggered by our hormonal cycles. Our fuses are shorter, we might be more argumentative, we might be more prone to making a “mountain out of a molehill”. Hormones also influence men and testosterone is known to play havoc with young men’s lives. Some cultures or communities in our society tell us that for the most part, it’s wrong to express our anger outwardly, so we work hard to suppress these emotions. However, when we suppress our feelings, rather than process and feel comfortable to talk about them, we can run into trouble. Its also important to remember, our hormones have a natural function – perhaps they give us the courage to let these emotions come to the surface – in essence saying – “hey, pay attention to me, I need your help.”
Is it really that harmful to get angry?